🧚♀️ HOW TO BREAK FREE FROM VICTIM MENTALITY 🧚♀️
... it's a long text and perhaps worth it?
It can be disempowering to live as a victim, or with a victim. With awareness, a desire to change, and create new habits, you can outgrow the mentality. A life lived with gratitude and kindness is far better than one of resentment and bitterness. Empowerment and self-command are available to everyone, and with a new attitude and new behaviors, they're yours for the taking. The first step, after embracing the potential wounds and situations, it is simply to decide that you're ready to stop being a victim. And turn the pain into power. Just like I did, and many others.
Are you ready?
1.🚾💤🆗🔜🧀🥕
Take ownership and responsibility for your own needs and wants. Determine what you want and what’s important to you. Name it, and do what you need to do to make it happen — for yourself. Don’t waste time blaming or getting angry at those who don’t want or need the same things you do, don’t wait for them to come on board or help you get what you want. Get busy taking care of what’s important to you, and leave the others out of it.
2.❎❎❎
Practice saying “no.” If you don’t want to do something and don’t (realistically) have to do it, don’t do it. Remember that you are allowed to have needs, just like other people.
3.🙅♀️🙅♂️✋❌⛔️
Stop blaming. When you hear yourself going into blame stories, whether against other people, the world, life, whomever... say “stop” to yourself out loud, and actually turn your attention away from your blaming thoughts.
4.💪 💪💪🦹♀️🦹♂️
Become aware of the root of your sense of powerlessness. Before you construct the next narrative on who’s stealing your power, get curious about the underlying feelings of powerlessness that precede all situations.
5.👩❤️👩🐣🐹🌹
Be kind to yourself. When you’re blaming the universe and life for your suffering, you’re not actually attending to your suffering or helping yourself feel better. By claiming the victim role, you are intensifying your pain. With victim identity in play, you’re not only suffering because of whatever happened, you’ve now added to that suffering the fact that you don’t get what others get, because you’re cursed, life and everyone in it is out to get you, and basically, the universe hates you. (Feel better?)
6.💝 👐⛪️💌❤️💛
Turn your focus on helping others. When you’re in victim mentality, the whole world is about you and your pain. Acknowledge your suffering with kindness, and then consider how you can help another being. As counterintuitive as it may be, the more you feel deprived, you more you need to give. Offering kindness is the surest antidote to “Poor me.”
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7.🙏 ☯️
Practice gratitude. Victim mentality focuses you on your suffering, specifically what you’re not getting. Try flipping your perspective and focusing on something that matters to you, that you do enjoy, and that you do "get." Shift your attention from what you’re missing to what you have.
8. 📝🧚♀️🧜♀️🎨
Write a list of the ways you can change the bad situation. When you feel like a victim, you convince yourself that there’s nothing you can do to change your circumstances, but that’s almost never true. Get busy with how you can try and improve the situation, even if it feels impossible.
9.👂 👂👂👂👂
Practice empathic listening. When listening to other people, try listening with the intention of feeling what they’re saying from inside their hearts. Stop focusing on what you need to do about what they're saying, what you think about what they’re saying, or anything else that has to do with you. Listen as if you were just ears hearing, without putting yourself in the way.
10. 🤝☺️👯♀️👫👨❤️💋👨
Practice forgiveness. When you play the victim role, you’re deciding to hold onto bitterness and anger and the certainty that you’ve been wronged — often without even investigating what the other's intention may have been. Instead of poisoning your own experience with resentful thoughts, try practicing compassion and understanding for the other. Start a new habit: make dropping resentment and trying out forgiveness a daily practice!
🤩Life can be very pleasurable and worth living - and it's up to us to create our lives as we want it. Challenging experiences leave a trait, that for sure and a wise wo/man turns it into power.
NOTE! Now, I pointing towards privileged western worlds where there are resources and capacity.